- New
Burn time is the supplier’s figure. Our own guideline is 5–7 hours per ounce on a single wick.
About this candle
Overview
A humorous holiday candle for the friend whose December parties run legendary and whose guest list keeps growing. This Cedar Crate Market candle captures the chaos of festive gatherings with a witty label and a warm, forest-fresh scent that works in any crowded room.
Why You'll Love It
- 60+ hours of burn time — hand-poured 100% soy wax in a 13.5 oz reusable glass jar that outlasts most celebrations
- Balsam + Cedar fragrance — fresh fir and balsam with cedar depth; reads clean rather than sweet, won't compete with food or drinks
- Phthalate-free and non-toxic — vegan, cruelty-free, non-GMO formula safe for any home
- Perfect gift for any occasion — secret santa, white elephant, housewarming, or the host who deserves recognition
- Hand-poured in Minnesota — made in the USA in small batches, with a signature white jar and printed label
Frequently Asked Questions
Q: Is a funny scented candle good for a secret santa or white elephant gift?
A: Yes. A humorous candle works across age groups and requires no sizing or allergy considerations. The joke does the work, making it ideal for someone you barely know.
Q: What scent is best for a house full of holiday guests?
A: Fir and cedar is the safest choice for a crowded room because it feels fresh and doesn't compete with food or other aromas. Light it before guests arrive.
Q: What should I bring to a holiday party when staying overnight?
A: A candle beats another bottle on the counter because the host keeps it. Hand it over at the door as a thoughtful, reusable gift.
Shipping & returns
Orders leave our US warehouse in 1–3 business days. Items from different makers may arrive in several parcels, each with its own tracking.
Funny Christmas Candles – Smells Like Holiday Shenanigans | 13.5 oz Soy Candle
Woody · 13.5 oz
Shipping calculated at checkout.
Smells like: Fresh forest fir and balsam with warm cedar undertones
- Soy wax
- Cotton wick
- Reusable vessel
- Burn within sight, away from drafts, children and pets
Candle care
Four habits that decide how long it lasts-
Trim the wick
About 5 mm before every burn. A long wick makes a tall flame, and a tall flame smokes the glass.
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Let the first burn finish
Two to three hours, until the melted wax reaches the edge. Wax remembers its first pool — cut it short and it tunnels for good.
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Stop at four hours
Longer and the glass gets hot and the scent flattens. Retire the candle when about 1 cm of wax is left.
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Keep the jar
Hot soapy water lifts the last of the wax — soy softens at a much lower temperature than paraffin. Then it is a pot, a tumbler, a planter.
- Trim the wick to about 5 mm before every burn.
- First burn: let the pool reach the edge, roughly two to three hours.
- Never burn for more than four hours at a stretch, and stop at 1 cm of wax.
- Keep it in sight, on a heat-resistant surface, away from drafts, children and pets.
We sell fragrance for pleasure, not for treatment. Nothing here is intended to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent any disease, and no candle or diffuser purifies the air. These statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration.
If a scent gives you a headache or sets off asthma, that is a real reaction — stop using it and open a window.